Dear Teen Me,
Specifically Age 13.
Always remember what pants you wear to school because Uniform pants all tend to look the same- and let’s just say- there might be an awkward moment when you might accidentally take someone else’s pants AND YOU WILL NEVER LIVE IT DOWN.
Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way.
I feel like you need a list of things to avoid. A giant all encompassing list of things that will tell you all the awkward moments you end up encountering and tell you how to avoid them. However, it will create a paradox, and really- being realistic- there may never be a time machine that could send this back to you. So. Your red jacket is awesome. Don’t listen to the jerks who tell you it’s really ugly or weird etc. It’s the best piece of clothing you may ever own. EVER. They are merely jealous that they don’t have a fire-engine red plastic jacket that exudes awesomeness.
It sounds like in the future I’m obsessed with clothing- but I’m not- I just felt you needed to know these things before anything else. Here- something to convince you that I’ve not gone crazy and decided that clothes are the best thing you could ever talk about.
NEVER DATE YOUR BEST FRIEND.
No, wait. That’s not right.
When you meet him- you won’t even want to date him. He’ll just be that weird guy who you’re friends with. He’s weird, and you’re hopelessly in love with someone else. Over time though, he’ll grow on you- like a… fungus.
Uhm. That’s a terrible comparison. Caleb is not a fungus. But he is a fun-gi! Badoom-sh! (No, sorry- your jokes don’t get better. There’s no future for you as a world- famous comedian. ) He’s the best friend a girl could ask for. He’s nice, he laughs at your terrible jokes, he listens when you whine- and sorry hon, you do that a lot. When you end up falling in love with him it will be simple, nice, and mutual for a change. He may not be the best looking guy but he’s one of the best guys you know.
Until you break his heart six months after you start dating. It’s a really stupid reason- but if I could kick you I would.
Never fear though. Somehow, the friendship gods have smiled upon us, and we still are really good friends. YOU BEAT THE CLICHÉ! You can date a best friend without killing the friendship!
However, you can never ever ever ever make someone love you. They either love you- or they don’t. I was there during all those times you wrote boys names in your notebook, relishing the ache of unrequited love. It ends up eating you from the inside. You try so hard to please them, and make them notice you that you end up wasting the best years of teenagerdom pining over a jerk with man boobs. It’s true. He had really nice eyes but man titties and you were too stymied to notice.
True love will find you on the way out of your teens. I sound like a bad horoscope, but he’s tall, dark and handsome, and maybe just maybe about as crazy as you are.
Screw getting people to like you in general. If you have a gut feeling about someone, go with your gut. If they seem like a jerk, ten to one, they’ll end up a jerk. If you don’t, they may end up posting pictures of you to 4chan saying that you look like a man and then lying about it. Do not get involved with drama. Drama is bad. VERY BAD.
Focus on things and getting better at them. Appreciate time, and the abundance you have! Take up knitting. Trust me. You’ll love it. Write more poetry, and try not to make it all about Captain man-tits. Read more books. Read all of the books!
The main thing I want you to do is never stop believing in yourself. No matter what anyone says- do not stop writing. Don’t give up on that novel you want to finish. Don’t stop entering writing contests. Don’t stop auditioning for things. Don’t stop trying to learn music. Don’t stop singing. Just don’t stop. Never stop. Never give up.
Love your Adult self.